Soft skills

I have learned at school how to write an essay about something that's going on right in front of my eyes. E.g. making coffee.

I have learned in university how to use an open flame to form glass into a skalpel.

I have learned in my job how to fill out forms that allow me to enter my work place without getting sued.

I have learned all of these things, because some idiot thought that it might be a brilliant idea to teach them to me.

Now I know all these extremely useful things, but do I know how to flirt with someone effectively enough to convey that I like him? No such luck. I simply have no social soft skills.

I don't really know how to make casual conversation or small talk. I end up talking about things noone should talk about to someone who is supposed to like you more afterwards, not less.

I don't know how to invite someone for coffee in an appropriate way.

I don't know how to fake interest in someone's life, even if I would much rather talk about the colour of lilacs or the smell of the orange plantations in Portugal.

I don't know how to laugh at the right places and end up laughing in the wrong places and then people look at me funny.

I would have liked my education to prepare me for the important things in life. And no, learning how to extract coffein from coffee is not one of them. Although that was at least interesting... but I digress.

I heart everyone who takes the time to read my blog. I know I don't make sense all the time. Well... I know I don't make sense most of the time.

P.S. I once almost applied for a job where I would have composed the schedule for university students studying immunology so they learn something useful. I should have taken that job, even if it was in Canada. Just sayin'.